facing fear

A Disorder: a Definition or an Opportunity? (#36)

(Dedicated to all those who have ever been diagnosed with a mental disorder)

One question that I’m often asked is when did I first realize that I had OCD? Interestingly, from an early age, I had been achingly aware that I handled my fears differently from my peers. Unknowingly, I had been working on components of my anxiety disorder ever since then- awareness grows as a person grows.  Understanding the depth and complexities took over a decade but it was in college that I was professionally diagnosed. 

The Ghost and The Phoenix (#34)

I wish that I was one of those people who matures and grows, emotionally and spiritually, during the good times in my life, but I’m not.  For whatever reason, when happy, I often run stagnant.  Instead, it is the tragedy within my life that motivates me to my greater good.  I’m not speaking of enduring because even a drug addict is enduring, just in the most dysfunctional way possible.  What I’m speaking of is the overcoming of hardships that all of us face at one time or another.  Those difficult times that appear insurmountable on the front end, and on the back end, you wonder how you wer

Zipping Through My Fears (#27)

I have a fear of heights.  What’s strange is this wasn’t always so.  I remember on one ordinary day, I looked down from the top of a boulder that I scaled in Lake Tahoe; it was the first time that I ever visibly shook from fear.  I was shocked by my own reaction because until that moment, I had no idea that this fear of heights existed. 

My Remarkable Me (#4)

I woke up one ordinary day and realized this was the day that I was going to face my fears.  As I’ve previously mentioned, I harbored a deep seeded fear that maybe all the critics were right and I was “crazy” on some level.  This was a recurring theme for me- Did I mention that OCD can be a wee bit repetitious?  Although I recognized the pattern, I was stumped in regards to how I could fix it or if it could be fixed.  Then, a thought hit me or rather, more of a question, “Are you ready to be professionally diagnosed?”